Nonverbal Communication: A Personal Repsonse

Growing up in Minnesota and being raised by my parents really allowed me to be both a strong and compassionate individual. They taught me to see the value in relationships with my family, friends, and Jesus. My walk with God has changed throughout my life based on my idea of dependence on Him. Over time I realized that He has been and will continue to be a constant in my life. Because of my walk with Christ I have an entirely new and generally optimistic perspective on people and our world, despite all of the terrible things going on. I smile more, I try to make eye contact with and really see each person for who God says they are, and I am constantly trying to meet new people and pour out love on the cashier at the grocery store, the waiter, or the homeless person on the street. 

Being involved with youth group at church and school clubs while growing up allowed me to be more active in traveling and experiencing new cultures. Before coming to Europe I had witnessed a variety of diverse groups of people which I think has played a huge role in the way that I interact with other individuals, especially those from other backgrounds and cultures. I have been so much more patient and willing to hear their perspectives which will benefit me the rest of my life and it makes me a great candidate for continuing to travel the world and see as much as I can. Choosing to major in communication at Bethel was never part of my plan but it just sort of worked out that way which has already opened so many doors for me and I have learned so much about relationships and the key to effective communication. 

Communication in general has two parts to it: the verbal and the nonverbal sides. I’ve always been competent when it comes to communicating with other people and the older I’ve gotten the more confident I feel in my ability to properly articulate my thoughts and opinions. It wasn’t until I changed my major that I actually started to care about the way that people talked and expressed themselves through the use of nonverbals. Sometimes I wish that I didn’t care as much as I do but I think I’ve grown to appreciate the way that we communicate back home in the states. The styles between Europe and America are very different but studying the unique types over here has made me appreciate my own preference back home, but I’ve also gained a whole new level of understanding and perspective for communication and the way in which it occurs in completely different cultures.

Allowing Jesus to live through me has not only changed my relationship with Him for the better but it also greatly impacts the way that I treat other people. Communicating my fears and also praises to God is something I’ve tried to become more confident in and just reminding myself that He already knows my thoughts and what is on my heart but it makes it all the more sweeter when I take time to express those things directly to Him. My nonverbal communication has always been very warm and inviting towards others which is a true testament that Jesus is my source of joy and compassion that I have for those around me. There are days where it can be a complete test of faith to love on my neighbors and sometimes I fail, but I also allow God to work in me in those hard moments as well. My non Christian friends have told me time and time again that there seems to be something different about me, that I am always happy no matter the circumstance, or that I am constantly willing to serve the people around me. It’s comforting to hear these things, but I can’t take credit for any of it. I know that He is doing good work in me and continuing to shape me and there is nothing more humbling than asking God to remove any part of you that doesn’t reflect Him and that is the current process I’m going through. It’s challenging and messy, but in the end it’s so worth it if God used me as a vessel to reach even one person.

I do appreciate our culture back home and the way that we communicate to one another even if it may be more passive, however I can see that there might be more effective ways to communicate. The Austrian culture is extremely direct which leaves hardly any room for misunderstandings, and they get their point across a lot faster than we would back home. The Italian culture on the other hand is a lot more focused on the relational aspect of communicating which could be seen as a negative because their message could potentially be confused from their nonverbals that are generally warm. Our way of communicating back home is very passive and I do wish that wasn’t always the case, especially because as I got older and had to have some confrontational conversations with friends and family I was terrible at it and I hated doing it because it was the complete opposite of beating around the bush like I had always relied on. Being passive doesn’t teach us to put words with what we think, but it allows our fears to get in the way of a potentially open discussion that could occur. Being surrounded by so many different cultures and styles of communication this semester I have really gained a sense of understanding and knowledge for why this occurs and how I can be more accepting of it and also how to respond appropriately to the communication styles that differ from my own.